Committee for Children Blog

What’s On My Face?

This week's blog post comes from Juliet Kandel Kristjanson, our Client Implementation Specialist.

Juliet Kandel KristjansonWould it surprise you if I said that one of the most frequently asked questions our client support staff receives is, “When are you going to make a Second Step program for adults?” It’s a loaded question, in spite of the laughs that typically follow. To twist an oft-used Facebook line: Working with other humans doesn’t make you a people person any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

Years ago in a workshop I facilitated for the staff of an elementary school on the topics of student harassment, intimidation, and bullying, we listed factors that can create a power imbalance among children. The conversation took an interesting turn when one of the staff members said, “What about power differences among adults? What about adult bullying?”

Unsure of how far they would want to explore this question as a group, I took a safe, general approach that would give them an out. I asked the group to name factors that contribute to power imbalances among adults. Here are some of the not-so-general responses they gave:


  • Being close friends with the principal

  • How long you’ve been working in the same building or district

  • The loudness of your voice

Their openness surprised me and reminded me how each individual in a workplace has the power to make an impact on the tone of that environment. While we can look to administrators to set the standard for interpersonal communication, every individual contributes to the climate of a workplace. Dr. Marvin Berkowitz provides food for thought on the importance of social competence for educators in this article: The Good Leader.

At the individual level, there are many small steps we can each take to improve our workplace environment. For example, while I’m pretty good at using my words in a discussion, it seems I could benefit from a body language tune-up. I’ve been told more than once that my “concentration” face actually looks angry. It troubles me to think that when I’m concentrating on listening to my colleagues, they may be reading anger on my face. So, my little contribution to the workplace environment this week is to ask myself, “What’s on your face?” Now if I can just keep from blurting this out in a Roseanne Roseannadanna voice, I will have made some true progress in my workplace social skills. “Hey! What’s that thing on your face?”

Note: If you need a dose of a Roseanne Roseannadanna to know what I’m talking about, click here.